The following is an interview with Dr. Omer Shareef, a professional in Islamic psychology, who explores the intersection of faith, mindfulness, and personal growth during Ramadan. Rooted in psychological insight and spiritual reflection, this conversation delves into how the holy month can serve as a catalyst for holistic well-being.
Q1) One of the 3Ps for Ramadan is “Planning,” which we ideally start 2-3 months in advance. With Ramadan approaching, how can we reach “Perfection” by then? Is it achievable or too good to be true?
Dr Omer Shareef: Planning is key, because if we don’t plan, it is a plan to fail. We do see this very clearly from the Sunnah. At least from Rajab, Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) and his companions started to work on planning for Ramadan, and they’re more focused and preparing themselves, the planning is about how you shift yourself focused in the month of Ramadan and be in the position to get the best advantage of it from day one.
Planning starts at least sixty days before the month of Ramadan like how I am going to get the best of my Ramadan. You must rearrange and reschedule things and leave the month of Ramadan for its purpose. I’m not in any way suggesting that we should work less in the month of Ramadan. All what I am suggesting is we must have less distraction in the month of Ramadan. That’s what Islamic fasting is all about.
Then comes preparation. Preparing ourselves emotionally, physiologically and most importantly spiritually. Spiritual preparation comes from the time we start to plan, how and what we are going to do in Ramadan, how we can make this Ramadan the best Ramadan so far.
First comes planning and then preparation, this order is very important to ponder on how we can achieve perfection in Ramadan. However, perfection belongs to Allah swt. We must aim to do all that we can do within our capabilities and capacities and leave the rest to Allah for His blessings, mercy, and guidance. But if we can’t be in this position, then we haven’t prepared ourselves emotionally, physically, and spiritually, hence we haven’t done the best homework before Ramadan begins. We must prepare ourselves to be the best fit to compete. If you’re in the Olympics, you’re an athlete or you’re attending an exam or anything, there’s preparation. We do it before you hit the competition. Otherwise, you may not be able to compete. We must be prepared before Ramadan begins. Prophet Pbuh used to fast any days most outside Ramadan, it is in the month of Sha’ban, it’s like a warm-up leading to Ramadan. By doing so, the prophet has prepared his body, mind and his soul. Fasting is a commitment made by our mind, body and soul to our Creator. This is what is required, and we must do, otherwise, if we don’t plan, it’s a plan to fail.
Q2) During Ramadan, maintaining a sense of abstinence and spiritual discipline even after breaking the fast at Maghrib can be challenging, especially with social aspects like Iftar gatherings. How can one balance engaging in ibadah (worship) and participating in these social events without compromising the essence of Ramadan?
Dr Omer Shareef:
Balancing Worship and Socialization During Ramadan
Ramadan is a month of immense spiritual value, where every second holds greater rewards than usual. The stakes are especially high, with Laylatul Qadr being better than 83 years of worship. This is why we must ask ourselves: Is socialization necessary during Ramadan, or does it take away from the essence of self-discipline and devotion?
The Problem with Iftar Socialization
While some iftar gatherings serve a beneficial purpose—such as inviting non-Muslims to experience Ramadan and fostering understanding—many have become mere social events. The idea of an “iftar party” itself is contradictory. Ramadan is a month of self-discipline, yet people often treat Maghrib as the moment of overindulgence in food and socialisation, rather than a continuation of their spiritual journey.
One of the biggest issues with Iftar gatherings today is their competitive nature. It has become a statement of social status—one host serves six dishes, the next feels the need to double it, offering twelve types of sweets and extravagant meals. This cycle completely shifts the focus of Ramadan from self-restraint to excess and overindulgence. It is common in many cultures, particularly in the subcontinent, where women spend hours preparing elaborate meals. But what is the purpose of this? Have we transformed Ramadan into a month of feasting rather than fasting?
Another major concern is that social gatherings often lead to distractions. Conversations that start with simple check-ins about family and friends easily turn into gossip and unnecessary discussions. Even if someone has good intentions, it is difficult to control these conversations in large gatherings. Instead of engaging in ibadah (worship) or self-reflection, many end up spending their Ramadan nights in social chatter.
Finding a Balance: Is It Even Possible?
Some argue that socialization in Ramadan is essential for fostering a sense of community, especially for women in regions where access to the mosque for taraweeh is limited. While the need for belonging is understandable, does it justify gatherings that diminish the purpose of Ramadan?
There are ways to build community without compromising worship, and some families and neighborhoods have successfully implemented alternative methods:
- Home-Based Taraweeh Gatherings: Women can come together in small groups, rotating homes each week, with one sister leading the prayer. This allows for both social interaction and worship without the distractions of large iftar parties.
- Hiring an Imam: In some communities, women have hired an imam for the month of Ramadan and rented a small hall or community center for nightly prayers. This ensures structured ibadah while still fostering togetherness.
Ramadan is an Exam – Are We Preparing Well?
Think of Ramadan as an exam period. A serious student minimizes distractions, studies with focus, and avoids anything that could take away from their preparation. Similarly, Ramadan is a time when we should be striving to maximize our rewards, especially when the doors of Jannah are open, and the whispers of Shaytan are reduced.
The reality is that balancing excessive socialization with worship is extremely difficult. It is not just about time management—it is about maintaining the spiritual discipline that Ramadan teaches us. If we allow ourselves to indulge in distractions now, how can we expect to maintain self-restraint and spiritual focus for the rest of the year?
This is why we need to question the necessity of these social events. If we truly want to make the most of Ramadan, we must be intentional with our time and energy. Instead of seeking socialization that weakens our resolve, we should seek spiritual gatherings that strengthen our faith.
Q3) Fasting is meant to energize the body, yet some individuals adopt a passive mindset during Ramadan, which can create a negative impression in the workplace. How can this victim’s mentality be addressed to encourage a more proactive and positive approach?
Dr Omer Shareef: Every year, we hear the same concerns—how difficult it is to maintain discipline during Ramadan, how challenging it is to abstain from food, drink, and entertainment. This recurring “victim mentality” stems from a lack of preparation and understanding of true essence of Ramadan. If people only view Ramadan as a month of restrictions—where they can’t eat, drink, watch television, or socialize—it becomes a shock to the system rather than a spiritual opportunity.
The key to overcoming this mentality is education and community preparation well before Ramadan begins. Focus needs to be given on the essence of Ramadan. People will only plan for Ramadan if they understand its true value. If they grasp its purpose, motivation follows naturally, making them eager to engage in fasting and worship rather than feeling burdened by it. This is why mosques, and Islamic scholars must take an active role in preparing the community. It’s not enough to simply deliver lectures and leave—interactive workshops should be conducted before Ramadan, engaging youth and adults alike.
Practical solutions should be shared, from time management strategies to maintaining focus in worship, and youth engagement should be prioritized, making these sessions interactive and appealing so younger generations feel connected and motivated. Preparation for Ramadan should not be limited to religious teachings. Experts from various fields, such as doctors who understand Islamic principles, should be involved. Medical professionals can advise diabetic individuals on how to manage their health while fasting, ensuring they take the necessary precautions. Islamic scholars can clarify misconceptions about Ramadan, emphasizing that self-discipline should be embraced rather than resented. Mental health experts can offer guidance on how to maintain focus and motivation throughout the month. By incorporating different perspectives, we create a comprehensive and practical approach to Ramadan preparation, reducing unnecessary struggles and ensuring that people enter the month with clarity and confidence.
If we fail to educate and prepare ourselves, this “victim card” mentality will persist. People will continue to struggle unnecessarily and even develop aversion toward Ramadan and Islamic practices. However, Islam emphasizes taking personal responsibility for change. As Ali (RA) wisely stated, “Change begins from within,” a sentiment later echoed in various philosophies, including Mahatma Gandhi’s famous words. The message is clear: If we want a transformation in how people experience Ramadan, the effort must start with us. Education and a proactive approach are essential in ensuring that Ramadan is seen not as a month of restrictions but as a time of immense spiritual and personal growth.
Q4) Are the psychological effects of Ramadan fasting different from other types of non-religious fasting? If so, what makes them distinct?
Dr Omer Shareef: The psychological benefits of Ramadan are huge. The Quran, in Surah Baqarah (183), describes why we have to fast, and it’s amazing. There are 2.2 billion Muslims worldwide, and an estimated 1.5 billion fast. Although fasting is obligatory only for adults, many children join in. There are exemptions—menstruating, pregnant, or lactating women, the ill, travelers, and the elderly—but many still choose to fast because they feel they choose too.
Noble Quran clearly states that fasting leads to Taqwa—Allah’s focus, consciousness, and mindfulness. In Ramadan, Allah becomes greater than hunger, thirst, social media, or socialization. This practice creates neural connections in the brain that offer significant psychological benefits, including resilience and cognitive adaptability. The metabolic switch from fasting challenges the brain, like an intense workout, forcing it to adapt and leading to cognitive and psychological growth.
In other religions, fasting doesn’t carry the same clearly defined outcomes. It might be a day, nine days, or specific nights. In some cases, like Christianity, it has lost its original value—some say they are fasting but only give up chocolate for 40 days as part of the lent fast. In contrast, Ramadan is a month of discipline, teaching gratitude and appreciation for what we have. This reflection deepens our connection with the Creator.
Not eating, drinking, or abstaining from intimacy during daylight hours is just an outward appearance. The real transformation happens within. As Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) said, if one does not abstain from vain and indecent talk, their fasting is just hunger and thirst, and Allah does not accept it. Fasting isn’t just about food/drink—it’s abstaining from anything and everything that displeases our creator Allah swt. In doing so, we actively engage in what pleases our Creator. Islam is an amazing way of life, but unfortunately, it’s not always practiced as it should be.
Fasting teaches and reinforces in us, if we have the self-control and discipline to deprive ourselves from halal food, water and intimacy on every single day hours of the entire month of Ramadan this prepares us to be in a better position outside Ramadan to stay away from haram things for next 11 months in sha Allah until the next Ramadan arrives. Ramadan is a truly an annual spiritual vaccination program to protect us spiritually for the entire year.
Dr Omer Shareef is a Neuropsychiatrist and Senior Lecturer. He completed his specialist training in England, UK.
He has a keen interest in exploring the interconnections between the forms of brain injury and the psychiatric, neurocognitive, and behavioural presentations.
Dr Omer Shareef is also Vice President of the Australian Islamic Medical Association and has been working on multiple community projects, both local and international, including Healthy Fast – Healthy Ramadan!
